Eat My Words

Johanna Almstead:
Hi everyone. I am menu planning for my next guest, and she's a bit of a foodie. So I'm brainstorming some ideas, but I think I know, I know for sure that she loves a good charcuterie board and she loves a good crudité. So I know these are not so original, but I'm going to do a beautiful little crudité, sugar snap peas, some gorgeous sun-gold tomatoes are really nice right now. I'm going to do a little shaved fennel. I'm going to do a little endive and a really yum yogurt dill dip. And then I'm going to do a charcuterie with some like prosciutto and some salami, soppressata, maybe even a little chorizo. And then some good stinky cheeses, all the good stinky cheeses with some crusty bread and butter. A.
Nd then I'm starting to feel some fall vibes. I'm actually wearing a cashmere sweater right now, so I think I'm going to go cozy French. I'm going to do a coq au vin over some good buttery egg noodles, and then keep it really simple and hearty and delicious and cozy. And then on the side of that, I'm going to serve that with just a really simple gem green salad with some shallots and red wine vinaigrette, and keep it easy. I'm also going to bring extra baguette to the table with some salty butter, so in case there's any of the delicious juices from the coq au vin left up, we can mop it up with our crusty bread.
And you know what, I may ask her to bring dessert. She will never come empty-handed, she's one of those people. And she loves dessert, and she's really good at finding delicious dessert, so I'm going to just farm that one out to her. I'm so excited for you guys to get to know her. She's smart, she's honest, she's hilarious, she's chic. She's a foodie and loves to talk about food, and so I'm really, really excited for you guys get to meet her. So let's dig in.
Hello everyone and welcome to Eat My Words. My guest today is a friend and someone I've known or known of. I feel like I sort of knew of her for as long as I've been in the fashion industry. She is a seasoned industry veteran who began her career on the publishing side of the business. She's worked for amazing publishing giants like W Magazine and Lucky Magazine. She is the founder of her own brand consulting firm and specializes in luxury fashion, jewelry and accessories. She has worked with amazing brands such as Bumpsuit, Toms, Éterne, RE/DONE and more.
She's also a mother to her kind and beautiful boy Henry. She is a dog mom to her supermodel golden retriever Biscuit, who my crazy boy, Ty, is actually creepily obsessed with. She is a devoted daughter, a sister and friend. She's a foodie who is excellent at ordering for the table at restaurants. She makes a mean pesto sauce and does not mince words when it comes to advice and support. She's funny as hell, chic is all get out and one of my favorite humans. I'm so very grateful that she's taking the time out of her very, very, very busy and full life to sit down with me. Julia Kalachnikoff, welcome to Eat My Words.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Thank you so much for having me. That was so moving.
Johanna Almstead:
You wouldn't be the first who I brought to tears, just so you know.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Oh my God. Yeah, a little bit.
Johanna Almstead:
Tears are welcome here. Well, thank you for being here. I'm so happy because we get to talk about two of our favorite things, which are food and fashion, which you and I can both talk about for a very, very long time.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
I always like to give people context for how we know each other. And I was thinking back to when I was working at Prada, it was my first big job out of college, and you were working at W and you were an assistant, I think you were working in the closet. I don't know, because you were calling me for credit information and it was always like, I knew you as Julia Topolski from W Magazine.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
So I wasn't in the closet, but I was in the accessories department. So we luckily got to sit at a cubicle.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, okay. So you weren't officially locked in closet.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I was locked in a cubicle.
Johanna Almstead:
And I was remembering, this was pre, okay, this is bad, this is pre-email, so I used to have to fill out a fax, a piece of paper that would say Prada, you would say the item and the style number and the price and the color and all the things. And I would fax it to you and you would make sure that it got credited properly in a magazine. That was like when you would shoot, if you shot a Prada bag and it was on the page of a magazine, you read the little credits. That was my job and your job to make sure that that information was correct. And we would fax back and forth and we would call each other on the phone.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, and I would find your number using my Rolodex.
Johanna Almstead:
Yes. Our actual physical Rolodex.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Which was my most prized possession in the professional world at that time.
Johanna Almstead:
A hundred percent. And we would actually have to pick up our landline, our phone, whenever it rang. My phone was like if Conde Nast was calling or Hearst was calling, I was like, I had to know exactly who it was. You had to be at your desk, I had to be at my desk all the time. If I missed one call from one of you guys, it's not good.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Actually, when I started at W, we didn't have computers yet. I remember them wheeling over a cart with a computer for me, and I was like, no, thank you.
Johanna Almstead:
No, I'm good.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
And they were like, no, no, you have to have it. And I was like, why don't you bring me a fax machine instead? I was like, it's going to take up too much room on my desk. I'll keep the phone and just bring me a fax machine. They were like, no, it's not. It's not optional.
Johanna Almstead:
Did you also ride a horse and buggy to work? What the heck? This is crazy to think about this.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It was the year 2000. I graduated college in 2000, I was an intern at W and I started the week after I graduated college.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh my God, it's so nuts.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
And the fax machine was that really slippery, fadable paper too. It wasn't even normal.
Johanna Almstead:
It wasn't even real paper.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It wasn't.
Johanna Almstead:
It was a roll and you would cut it off, right?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh my God. One of my other jobs that I had to do at that particular company was, I had to go in at 6:00 in the morning and I had to read seven newspapers cover to cover. And I had to physically cut out the clippings and then I had to Xerox them on pages and I would make a book of, what was it called? It was called The Morning Clippings, that was this big. And then I would have to fax it, like the 20 pages of Xeroxed clippings, I would've to fax it to all of our offices around the world. And it had to get to there a certain point, at a certain time in Italy, and it was very stressful. But I was gluing it on, every morning.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Oh my God. One of my other insane, I can't believe I had to do that things was I used to pull imagery for the runway report for my boss, Carmen Borgonovo, who's the most incredible woman, and we used slides. So I would get slides from all the top shows and I would stand over a lightbox with a loop. And then I would edit based on trends, and then she would approve them and then we would give them to the art department. And everything was done, all of our market pictures were done on film.
Johanna Almstead:
I know.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
And Polaroid. I mean, we must have used, I don't even know, tens of thousands of sheets of Polaroid film.
Johanna Almstead:
A day.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
A month. Yeah, a day, a month. It was so analog, it was slow. I miss the slowness and the pace and the attention to detail and the meaningfulness behind those days, or what felt like meaningfulness. I struggle sometimes with the speed of things and just being able to keep up with it.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. And I feel like there was such an intentionality, intention with everything we did, and we actually had the time to have that attention to detail and intention with our work. And I feel like that's very hard to achieve now because the pace is just so bonkers.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
But it is sort of nice because if you make a mistake, it's so fast to get lost.
Johanna Almstead:
It's like, yeah, I'm moving on to this.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Although I am all for accountability, but it is nice to have that pace at times.
Johanna Almstead:
And it's also like they're not as glaring now because the media landscape and everything we're consuming is just so full on that, it's like, ah. It's just like a drop in the bucket now.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Exactly.
Johanna Almstead:
Whereas it used to be so scary.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. So I always like to start off with this question because I think it's just interesting to see where people think their journey began. Where would you say your journey began?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Professionally?
Johanna Almstead:
Whatever.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
So I was born in the very, very, very late '70s. And growing up, my mom always had magazines and she always had W, and I loved reading magazines. And my favorite show was Style with Elsa Klensch on CNN on Saturday mornings, watched it every single weekend and she would watch it too. And the supermodel '90s and House of Style. And my dad lived in New York when I was little. I grew up in Buffalo, but my dad lived in New York. And so the city called me from as far back as I can remember. New York was just, it wasn't an option, I was going to move here. And so as far as working in fashion, that's where I think my journey began, being little.
Johanna Almstead:
So you knew you wanted to work in fashion from a really young age?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah. I didn't know what working in fashion meant or any jobs or anything. I just would flip through and be like, I want that, whatever that is.
Johanna Almstead:
And so you moved to New York right after college?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
No, I moved when I was 17 for college.
Johanna Almstead:
For college, okay. And where did you go to college?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I went to Parsons. I have a BFA in photography, which I feel like a lot of, I know, no one knows that. I know, it's so funny. It's so funny too because next year is my 30th year in New York, I moved here in 1996, and this time of year becomes so collegey for me. My friends' kids are going to college, and I am reminded. The weather feels like when I moved here. I went to art school in the late '90s in New York, it was insane. It was so, so, so insane.
Johanna Almstead:
Where did you live when you first moved here?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
The East Village.
Johanna Almstead:
The East Village. In an apartment? Not like a dorm or anything?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I lived in dorms. Yeah, they have a dorm on 12th between 3rd and 4th. I lived, and then I moved to Union Square. And then I lived in my own apartment when I was 18 on 7th, between 1st and 2nd in 1998. And then I moved to Williamsburg right away when it was like-
Johanna Almstead:
You were an early adopter.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Well, my dad was a really early adopter. He lived there in the '90s.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh wow.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
'80s and '90s.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh my gosh.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah. I remember coming to New York when I was little and he lived off of the J-M-Z and there were just junkies all the way up on the stairs. He was an artist and he had sort of a bohemian, not very conducive to two kids lifestyle, but he drilled holes for a swing in his loft for us. And it was pretty feral, but it was fun. And so Brooklyn always felt like home to me. I've lived in Brooklyn for most of my 30 years here, with the exception of four years, I think.
Johanna Almstead:
Wow. And back then, did you have a picture in your mind of what having it all would mean, what your grownup life was going to look like?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yes, I did. For sure.
Johanna Almstead:
And what was it? And is it anywhere close to your life now?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Honestly, it's the opposite.
Johanna Almstead:
Really?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah. I wanted the flash of New York. I wanted the glamour. I wanted the flash. I wanted high heels and no kids and a cool job. And I wanted a little bit of the grit, I didn't mind the subway. I wanted a really fast life, which is pretty much the opposite of what I have now and what I want now. And right out of the gate, moving here in '96, going to art school, it was fast as hell and wild as hell. And I feel lucky to have gotten that out of my system in my 20s.
Johanna Almstead:
It becomes not as good of a look when we're in our 40s.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It's not sustainable. Even in my 30s, I was like, I'm tired.
Johanna Almstead:
We went hard. I mean, I think that industry, particularly I think at the time when we were in it, really young and climbing our way through it, I mean we went hard.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
The parties were wild. Grace Jones was performing at every single party we went to, and it was on the roof of somewhere. It was just a different time. It was so fast and fun and glamorous. It really was, it really was.
Johanna Almstead:
And so free. I think the whole idea of us not having phones, not having cell phones and not worrying about social media, and you just rolled. I think back to that time, and it was like every night we were going to something, right? Even if it wasn't for our job, it was because one of our friends or somebody else's friend had a gallery opening or a restaurant opening or a fashion party, or there was just always something. And then the night would just roll and roll and roll, and you'd end up at a loft party, and then you end up at Florent. And you just meet up with people or you say like, hey, I'm going to be at this party, and you happen to find them at midnight. And it's just such a different way of socializing too than it is now.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I just got so nostalgic for it, the way you were describing it. I was like, oh my God, it was the best.
Johanna Almstead:
It was the best. And we had so much fun.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, there was no consequences either. And waking up for work in the morning was fine.
Johanna Almstead:
I mean, I would sleep for three hours and then I'd go in to do my clippings.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
And we had these crazy wardrobes. I had the craziest wardrobe.
Johanna Almstead:
The craziest. I mean, I was wearing Prada runway pieces and I was 18 years old. No, I was 21.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Heels every day.
Johanna Almstead:
Heels every day, everywhere. Hair, makeup, cool accessories, ridiculous stuff.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I look at pictures, the ridiculousness is real, but it was so fun.
Johanna Almstead:
We turned out some looks.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
We really did.
Johanna Almstead:
I was thinking about, this was not even that long ago, wait a minute, it was still long ago, we did a Brooklyn Museum dinner or something, and you came and Taylor came. And Taylor texted on the way and was like, I think I look like an insane person because I'm wearing some crazy fluorescent green thing to match with a sweater. Anyway, we would always sort of just be like, I think I'm going to just work this tonight.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
The best was going to fashion week and then just stopping to grab a bite to eat in between. And I remember one time when Howard, my ex-husband, was working at Gramercy Tavern and a bunch of us fashion girls, we were going to Marc Jacobs show at the Park Avenue Armory, which was around the corner. So I was like, oh, well just go. One of my friends was wearing a leather bondage corset. Another one was wearing comb skirt that had a train, like combed hair or something. And we just rolled up at Gramercy Tavern and it was like, we looked insane compared to everyone else. But then in fashion terms, we were on the tamer side.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, you were just casual.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah. Ish.
Johanna Almstead:
I remember when I first started wearing a Prada, we would pull stuff from the closet to wear out to events that we had to be there representing the brand, so I'm wearing full on runway looks and full on runway shoes. Not the actual production, but runway shoes that are always 17 inches higher than the regular ones, just tottering around town.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Not meant to be worn, yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Tottering around town. Okay, did you work at W? That was your first job out of college?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
That was my first job out of college.
Johanna Almstead:
And you started as an intern?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I started as an intern. And then I worked there for six years, and then I went to Jane Magazine.
Johanna Almstead:
That's right. I love Jane Magazine. RIP.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, RIP Jane. It was wild because it was no longer the Jane days, it was Brandon Holley days, and it felt like the kids were running the show. Brandon was a great editor in chief, but she really trusted her staff and we just sort of did what we were going to do, and it was really cool. It was short for me, it was, I think under a year before it folded. But it was like, we just had complete autonomy over our positions.
Johanna Almstead:
That's so rare.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It was really rare, and especially in fashion, there's always someone that you need to get approval from, and it wasn't like that. It was a little bit milder. It was really fun.
Johanna Almstead:
And then where did you go after that? Is that when you went to Lucky?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
And then you were at Lucky for?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Ever.
Johanna Almstead:
Forever. Long time.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I think seven years.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. And then you eventually left Lucky, and then that's when you kind of went out on your own and started working at agencies and sort of flipped to the PR side, right?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
So I always try to explain this relationship because it's such a specific one to my PR trajectory and your editorial trajectory are sort of parallel, because as a PR person, you work your way up and then as an editor, you work your way up. And you and I happen to sort of be on the same, we kept finding each other at different points in our career. So for people who don't understand the relationship, your PR person at a brand is your go-to person that an editor who wants to shoot the brand or use the brand for anything or do anything with the brand, you're the point person. So you end up having these very close relationships with people at all the magazines and all the brands. That's sort of how our trajectory went.
So what was your favorite job that you've had in fashion?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I would say it's a tie between W and what I have now. W was just fun. It was wild, it was fun. It was the hardest, hardest, hardest I've ever worked. But the people that I worked with were just unbelievable. They're still my best friends. So creative, so cool, so hardworking, so genuine. You're really in the trenches together at those early jobs, like assistant associate level. It's like survival, we survived together.
Johanna Almstead:
Totally.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
But now I feel like after all of it, it's nice to wind up in a place where I feel like everything I've done and everything I've learned has allowed me to be in this place that I am now with a bit of creativity, a lot of freedom, and just sort of the ability to work on my own terms and for people that I really, really, really, really respect.
Johanna Almstead:
That's amazing.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
And I feel respected and I feel like adult.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, it's weird.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Which is really nice.
Johanna Almstead:
It's really nice.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It's weird it's really nice.
Johanna Almstead:
I have those moments where I'm like, oh, wow, I actually know stuff. I did all this. This has been a little.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
And people will listen.
Johanna Almstead:
And they respect it, yeah.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, it's wild. It's a funny thing to sort of wake up and realize that you are an expert in something. Oh my God, I know my shit.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, that it means something, that all of this stuff has finally culminated into a moment where it's like, this is what I think this is why. Take it or leave it, but I have the experience and knowledge to sort of back up what I'm saying.
Johanna Almstead:
Right. What's the best part of your work now?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It's the people. Well, there's two parts. I work with really, really, really small brands now, which I love, because I love being part of something that grows. And I love working with a small team where our experience I think, mine and yours, it's not that specific. It's like we can do a lot of things because of what we've done. We can write, we can do PR, we can edit, we can-
Johanna Almstead:
Be on a photo shoot.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
... be on a photo shoot. We can pinpoint trends pretty far in advance. And so when you work for a small brand, all of that stuff is valuable and it's really flexible. I forget the question.
Johanna Almstead:
It was about the best thing about your work now.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
So that I would say is, and I love watching a business grow.
Johanna Almstead:
So exciting. I feel like, especially because we both started out at these kind of legacy companies, so we weren't there when they were growing. And to watch something start from very, very small is super cool.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, it's really cool.
Johanna Almstead:
What's the worst part about your work?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I mean, I'm independent now, so it's-
Johanna Almstead:
All on you.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, it's all on me. And I'm a single mom now, and it's equal parts like freedom and stress, I would say. It's amazing because I can walk and pick my kid up from school, if he'll allow me to. I can go to the chorus performance or whatever. But also it's all on me, which is really, it can be really tough, just the stress of keeping it going.
Johanna Almstead:
And how was your transition? Because mine was definitely rocky. How was your transition into becoming a mother in this industry? At the time, you were not a single mother. You had a partner at the time and you were still working at a big magazine.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I was married. You know what, I have to say that it was great.
Johanna Almstead:
Really?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, I was working at Lucky at the time, and there were a ton of moms with slightly older kids. I felt really supported.
Johanna Almstead:
That's amazing.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah. Not so much from the corporateness of where I was working, but the immediate team, people were really understanding and really cool about like, yeah, get home to your kid. Or yeah, your kid is sick, or yeah, your kid has a doctor's appointment. And they were doing that too so it was great actually. I was getting hand-me-downs, physically and advice. I loved it. It was a really nice place to have had a baby.
Johanna Almstead:
That's awesome. I love that.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay, so we talked a little bit about what the scene was like when we were younger and coming through it, and until recently. You made a big decision 10 years ago to get sober. Can we talk a little bit about that and what that was like doing that in the environment that we just described, which was going hard, all of that? Are you okay to talk through what that was like and what led you to that decision and how it's been then since and what it's like to celebrate 10 years of that, which is such a fucking huge, huge, huge milestone? So congratulations.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Thank you.
Johanna Almstead:
So can we talk about that a little bit? Because I feel like for a little while in the industry you'd hear about people deciding to go sober, but it was always sort of pretty quiet and people weren't sharing about it. I feel like when you and a couple of our other friends decided to make that decision, you were very vocal about it, you were very clear about it, and you were like, this is what's going on.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah. I mean, it was really, really, really hard time for me. So I left Lucky in 2015, and leaving Lucky felt especially hard because publishing was dying. It was no longer what it was even 10 years before. And I knew that it was no longer for me, that I had to completely do something different, but within the industry. And there was a huge loss of identity that went with leaving Lucky for me, my identity as an editor, my sort of whole professional identity. And at the same time, my marriage was falling apart and I had a toddler. I was at a loss.
Johanna Almstead:
Jesus Christ.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It was really hard. And at some point, it went from being a really fun party lifestyle to sort of drinking was like a management tool.
Johanna Almstead:
Like a coping mechanism.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah. And then when I was no longer at Lucky and I was sort of routine-less and rudder-less, my whole life felt like it imploded. It was like a house was knocked down to the ground and there was only one way to get through it and that was start from scratch.
So I got separated, I got sober. A really, really, really good friend of mine who had gotten sober two years before, broke it down to me in a not very kind way I felt at the time, but it was in retrospect what I needed to hear. And so I just went in.
Johanna Almstead:
All in.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
All in. I didn't feel like I had any other options at that point.
Johanna Almstead:
Was it one thing that had happened or it was just that conversation with your friend that kind of woke you up?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It was a lot of things. It was so many things, and then it was like, why isn't this getting better? And then she broke it down to me and I was like, oh, maybe this is the problem, not the solution. Maybe drinking is the problem, not the solution. Or at least part of it.
Johanna Almstead:
At least part of it, right? In an industry where drinking, and in many cases drugs are a huge part of the professional social scene, how was that for you?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I think at that point, because I wasn't at Lucky, I was sort of on my own and trying to navigate what I was going to do next. You know what, I actually didn't work for a little bit. I wound up taking some time off, not because I wanted to or not because... I just did. It just sort of=
Johanna Almstead:
Happened that way between jobs.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It was hard to find a job and I don't know, it was just in between jobs, so I could really focus on getting sober, which I think gave me a really good foundation for living a sober life. And then when I re-entered the industry, I feel like I have such a good, one thing that I'm really good at is finding supportive friends, in and outside of the industry. I'm so proud of myself for finding these amazing people. So I've really felt really supported, in the industry with people that aren't sober or sober, and then my sober network and then just my friends. I've always really felt taken care of by them on this journey.
Johanna Almstead:
That's huge.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah. It's really all of it, honestly.
Johanna Almstead:
And how does your sobriety, your commitment to sobriety manifest now that it's been 10 years? Do you even want to drink ever? Is it?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
No.
Johanna Almstead:
No. Just not even part of the world.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
No. I mean, there are moments where I'm like, God, something would be nice to take the edge off. I don't have the urge to drink, but I do want to escape life sometimes.
Johanna Almstead:
So what do you do now?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Well, I go for a walk. I call somebody. I have all of these breathing techniques that I love. I pause, I do a lot of pausing. Someone once was like, if your heart is beating out of your chest when you're about to send the email, don't send the email.
Johanna Almstead:
That's really good advice.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Such good advice. Or if your heart is pounding out of your chest before you're about to say it, don't. One of the tenets I guess of sobriety is help someone, find someone to help. Self-esteem by esteemable acts.
Johanna Almstead:
I didn't know that part of it. That's really great.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
And there's a lot of little tricks and things that can help get someone out of a funk, someone like me. I don't always do them, but I know a lot of them.
Johanna Almstead:
You know them. You've them there, you should choose to use them.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
And is it hard, I mean, I feel like you're such a foodie. You love restaurants, you were married to a chef for a long time. Is that part hard, like navigating that world? You live in New York, you live in the best food city in the world. Is it hard being in that world or is it just something like it doesn't bother you?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
There's very few, if any aspects of my life that haven't been improved by me not drinking.
Johanna Almstead:
That's amazing.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
And eating out is one of them. I don't miss it. I mean, I miss, like I said, something to take the edge off, but eating out is even more enjoyable now.
Johanna Almstead:
That's so nice. And it doesn't bother you if there's people drinking around you?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
No, not at this point. I think earlier on, maybe it did, and so I would just leave. I don't want to infringe on anyone's good time. And if a situation just isn't comfortable for me, for any reason, whether it's to do with drinking or sobriety or just like my shoes hurt or the vibes are off, I'm out. That comes with age too. I think it's nice to just be in an age of like, I'm going to go home now.
Johanna Almstead:
I'm not going to stay in this uncomfortable place.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
I feel like I used to stay in uncomfortable places all the time.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Forever.
Johanna Almstead:
Forever, and just keep being uncomfortable. Usually doesn't get any better either.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
No, it gets worse.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. So what is an achievement that you're most proud of?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Parenting my son sober.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
By a landslide, my number one achievement.
Johanna Almstead:
Do you talk to him about it? What's his knowledge about it and how does that work? Because that I feel like might be a little bit hard.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, I think so too. He knows that I don't drink, he knows that his dad doesn't drink. He knows that it's been 10 years. He knows that I feel like it's not good for me. I'm sort of following his lead with questions. If he asks me, I'll tell him. I don't know. And actually, a good friend of mine who's sober, he has a son who's a little bit older and he's had that conversation. So I keep meaning to check in with him about, we spoke about it a while ago when he talked to his son and he was like, well, when you're ready, we'll talk about it and I'm ready now. It's sort of on a need to know basis. It's not a secret, but I'm not one of those people who's like, this is what it is. So he knows, but I don't know what he knows.
Johanna Almstead:
Got it. But you're getting ready to have a bigger conversation, you think, about it as he gets older.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah. Well, because 12 and a half, he's going to start drinking soon probably.
Johanna Almstead:
I know. Isn't that fucking crazy?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
It's crazy. I imagine too, if he has two parents live a sober lifestyle, he probably should know and understand the implications genetically what that means for him too.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, a hundred percent.
Johanna Almstead:
Which again, is kind of a big conversation to have.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It is, but I'm not scared of it, and I don't think he's scared of it. When I was growing up, no one talked about anything. Literally, no one talked about anything. My grandmother's favorite phrase was, no news is good news. It was like, don't come to me with-
Johanna Almstead:
My mom says that all the time. My mom still says that.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
And it's like, you know what?
Johanna Almstead:
Maybe some news would be good.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, let's just talk about it. Because when you don't talk about it, then it feels like a secret. And then there's shame involved, and then there's fear. And the more we talk about it, it takes the wind out of the sails. It just sort of makes it real and approachable and accessible and just it right-sizes it.
Johanna Almstead:
Totally. I feel like it takes all the energy out of it. I was thinking about this, I was well into my 40s, I think when I had this conversation. I was in the car with my husband. I grew up in a family similar to you, nobody talked about anything. It was very scary to talk about anything. If there was ever any sort of sit down, it was always terrifying, that heart racing thing, that clench in your stomach. And my husband and I were in the car, so he was raised in a very different family. They dealt with stuff head on, big, loud Italian. Everybody knows everything. No secrets in that family, everyone's up in your business all the time. He was playing a voicemail on speaker in the car, and his dad left a message saying something like, "Hey, I need to talk to you. Give me a call." And I wasn't even the recipient of the message, I got this tightness in my chest.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I'm panicking right now. I'm like panicking.
Johanna Almstead:
Right? And I looked at him and I was like, "Is everything okay? What is it?" He's like, "What are you talking about?" I said, "He said he needs to talk to you." And I was like-
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I already have 5,000 ideas of the doom and gloom that he... I can't.
Johanna Almstead:
A million percent, right? I have it right now. As I'm saying it, I'm getting a dry mouth.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, me too.
Johanna Almstead:
And he was so like, what is going on with you? And I said, "Well, if I had ever received that message from my father, it would've meant like shit was going down." Divorce was happening, an affair, someone died.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Something really, really, really bad.
Johanna Almstead:
Someone had a bad diagnosis. And he looked at me like I had 17 heads, he was like, that's really, really sad. And I was like-
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Well, I have that from bosses too.
Johanna Almstead:
Me too. Totally.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Work and family. Same exact.
Johanna Almstead:
So I do have those moments as a parent, and I'm sure you do too, where when I handle something just very directly and very calmly and we just talk about it, I'm like, look at that. We just did it.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Breaking the cycle.
Johanna Almstead:
We just talked about sex. Oh my God, we just talked about money. Oh my God, we did it. It's okay.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I'm so proud of us.
Johanna Almstead:
So proud of us. We are breaking mega crazy generational trauma cycles.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
It's crazy, right?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yes, because it's so inherited.
Johanna Almstead:
It's so inherited. And it's so weird that still, and I think often that's why I chose the partner I chose because there's not an option for that weirdness.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I love that.
Johanna Almstead:
There just isn't. He's just like, what the fuck? What? What? Okay.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It's so good.
Johanna Almstead:
I think he came into my life for a reason to just shake it out of me, because I still have a very hard time. I still will have a hard time talking about money, about sex, about relationship stuff. It's hard. So then I started a podcast so I can talk about all of it.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I know. It's so nice. We're so free.
Johanna Almstead:
We're so free. But yeah, I can imagine that that is, I think a lot of why we lean on the coping mechanisms we lean on, or did lean on, because you just couldn't face any of it head on. It turns into a monster, right?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
A hundred percent. And the other thing too is, I'm not afraid to go to him and be like, hey, that thing that we talked about last week, I thought about it, I was wrong. It's like I had this idea that everything was set in stone. It's like once you have a conversation with your kid, it's like it must remain there within those confines.
Johanna Almstead:
That is the edict that has come from high.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
And it's like, he can understand, I'm sorry, I was wrong. I thought about it. I have a new perspective on that.
Johanna Almstead:
I changed my mind.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Can we talk about that more? I actually don't know the answer to your question. Let's find someone that does or not or look it up or whatever. It doesn't have to be this thing.
Johanna Almstead:
Yes, this testimonial that doesn't [inaudible 00:37:26], where it's some serious statement of authority that is then set in stone.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah. And that's how I feel about the conversation with him about sobriety is like, it's going to be ongoing, it's going to be really messy, and I'm just going to have to say that I don't know the answers. I'm doing my best.
Johanna Almstead:
Have you thought about what you're going to do when he starts to drink? If he starts to drink. Because that feels like that could be very triggering. That's going to be triggering for me and I'm not sober, so I can imagine that it could be.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah. I mean like I said, I have a lot of friends that are sober parents that are living it now and I'm going to outsource. And I'm going to have to surrender, his path is not my path and his mistakes are not my mistakes.
Johanna Almstead:
Now I'm having anxiety for you.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I know. It's like he's going to make mistakes, he's going to make mistakes that I made. Some are going to be worse, some are going to be better, but we're here to guide them. It's got to be like a loose garment, you know what I mean? I actually want to lock him up in his room forever.
Johanna Almstead:
I mean, same. Me too. Yeah, Michael's always like, they're just going to live with us forever, right? I'm like, I don't know if we really want that, but yeah, kind of.
Okay, what's something that you once believed about yourself that you've since outgrown?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Well, I guess what I would say is I didn't think I had the capacity for change. I thought that I knew what I wanted and would get it and then I would live happily ever after. I knew I wanted to work in fashion, I started working in fashion. I knew I wanted to be married, I met my husband. We fell in love, we got married. I knew I wanted a kid, I had that. And then it was like, okay, you have all of this stuff, it's not working. You're not happy, that's not it.
And so I didn't think that I could be happy without all of those things at one time, and I'm the happiest I've ever been right now. And it's such an inside job, it's so corny, but it really is. And I'm not scared of change the way I was because I've lived through so much of it. I'm still scared of it, but I know I'm going to come out and be fine. Truly.
Johanna Almstead:
That's huge.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Even though I'm scared in the moment. So it's like, clients come and go, relationships come and go, I'm going to be fine.
Johanna Almstead:
That's huge.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It's liberating.
Johanna Almstead:
That's amazing. Is there anything that you've said no to that you wish that you had said yes to?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Not really. I don't think. I mean maybe some travel here and there, but that feels pretty insignificant. I don't really have any regrets. I really have the perspective or I've gained the perspective that everything that's happened or everything I've lived through has really transformed me into the person that I'm supposed to be in this moment and that I'm right where I'm supposed to be, even if it's uncomfortable. Things could definitely be better for sure, but they're good.
Johanna Almstead:
And they might not have turned out that way if you had gone a different path or lived a different way.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
So do you have any advice that you would give to your 20-year-old self when you were running around New York City in the middle of the night?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I don't think so.
Johanna Almstead:
No? Got to just let it go. Let them live.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, because she had so much fun. And she fucked it up so royally that she made it here, which is like I said, where I think I'm supposed to be. I mean, I definitely would've saved some things. Don't get rid of everything. Buy less fast fashion. Lay off the heels a little more, you're going to have plantar fasciitis.
Johanna Almstead:
Those heels are going to come back to bite you in the as with their plantar fasciitis.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Enjoy brown hair while you still have it. But I think I would want to do it the same, I really would.
Johanna Almstead:
It's all part of the picture.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Even like have more fun, it's going to end. No, I had just the right amount of fun.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, so much fun. God. Okay, what's your idea of a perfect day off? If you are like, no clients, no nothing, no kid around. Kid could be around, but you don't have to have your kid around. What would you do?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
You know what? I had sort of a perfect day on Sunday. My son was with his dad. I got up, I took the dog for a walk in the park, like really long walk with friends. I have a mom dog-
Johanna Almstead:
A dog mom group.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yes. We're called the dog moms. There's four of us. We all have dogs and we all have kids, and the kids are varying ages and we are really good friends. We see each other every day, so we know insane things about each other's lives. And it's such a joy, it's such a gift. So I would walk with the dog moms. Then I went to the beach for a few hours by myself, and I just sat at the beach for a couple of hours and read and listened to some music, and went for a dip in the ocean. I came back, I took a nap, and then I met two of my best friends for dinner and I was in bed by 10. It was the perfect day.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, that is dreamy.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
I love that day for you. I want that day, especially be in bed by 10.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I know, it was accessible. I just did it. It was great.
Johanna Almstead:
That sounds lovely. Okay, so now we are at the very, very exciting point in this interview where we do the lightning round of silly questions. And a lot of them are food related, so I feel like you're going to be really good at this, because we didn't even really start talking about food yet. Just tell me what comes to mind it, first thing, favorite comfort food.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Pasta.
Johanna Almstead:
Any particular sauce? Any particular shaped pasta or just pasta?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I mean, all of it.
Johanna Almstead:
All of it. What is something you are really good at?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Baking. I'm a good baker.
Johanna Almstead:
You are a good baker. What is something you are really bad at?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Roasting meat. This is only food, right?
Johanna Almstead:
No, it doesn't have to be food. It can be anything.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Oh, oh God.
Johanna Almstead:
Something else you're bad at.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I'm bad at so many things.
Johanna Almstead:
Choose one, the one you're most proud of being bad at.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I guess currently, a work-life balance. The minute I start working from my phone, which is something I do constantly now, it's over.
Johanna Almstead:
You're in the rabbit hole and you can't get out.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, I just don't have separation.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, I hate that. It's hard.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Me too. It's so hard.
Johanna Almstead:
It's hard. Sometimes I like to sit down at my computer because that feels like at least it's like this is work time. But when I'm doing it on my phone and I'm on the go and I'm trying to do seven other things, it gets really muddy.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It's so messy.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. What's your favorite word?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Oh my gosh. I don't know.
Johanna Almstead:
You like words. It's can be your favorite word today. You don't have to put any pressure on it.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I'm so pressured.
Johanna Almstead:
We can skip it and come back if you're feeling pressured back.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay, so best piece of advice you've ever received.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Maybe just take it easy.
Johanna Almstead:
That's good. Take it easy.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, take it easy. I can get myself so riled up so easily and then operating from a state of panic, it's actually pretty comfortable for me.
Johanna Almstead:
Panic is?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, I can relate to that.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, it's like as a parent and as a professional, panic is sort of a, can be a status quo sometimes, so take it easy.
Johanna Almstead:
I like that. If your personality were a flavor, what would it be?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I don't know.
Johanna Almstead:
Really? You are such a good foodie, descriptive person.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I feel sort of shy. I don't know.
Johanna Almstead:
You should hear some of the things that people have described themselves as. It's pretty amazing.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I've heard some of them.
Johanna Almstead:
Would it be spicy? Let's get a flavor profile, first of all.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I think I'm definitely on the spicier end.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay,. And are you like a horseradish? Are you like a wasabi? Are you like a chili pepper? Szechuan?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
No, I think I'm a spicy that sort of mellows. Like a spicy, that becomes borderline sweet.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, what about shishito peppers? Are you a shishito pepper?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah. You know what? That's actually perfect, because sometimes they're mild and then sometimes you get one and you're like, you're on fire.
Johanna Almstead:
Yep. There you go.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
That's perfect. That's perfect.
Johanna Almstead:
Get a little blistered.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Thank you for your assistance, yes.
Johanna Almstead:
There you go. This is what my new profession is going to be, is I'm going to do, you know how people read your aura? I'm going to be like, your personality.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
You're really good at it.
Johanna Almstead:
It's weird. I also love shishito peppers.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Me too.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay, least favorite food. I feel like you are a very adventurous eater. What are you not even trying?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I'm not eating organs.
Johanna Almstead:
Of any kind?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
No.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Last supper, what are you eating tonight?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Roasted chicken, a baguette, butter, really good butter. Maybe some sort of, it sounds boring, but some sort of sauteed vegetable.
Johanna Almstead:
Really? On your last meal?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah. I don't know. Just because it all is good together. And then a lot of different desserts.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Like which desserts?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I love caramel, I love ice cream. I love cake. I mean, I'm not so much a chocolate person, but all the desserts. I'll pick them all.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Maybe we have to do a dessert bar for you.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Apple pie.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Apple cake. Any kind of cake.
Johanna Almstead:
Are you drinking anything with this meal?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Seltzer. I'm like a seltzer. Actually, I was with my friend in the Adirondacks a couple of weeks ago, and in the afternoon I just started drinking a Spindrift on ice. I called it my cocktail. It's like, God, it's such a good drink. And she's like, "It's not a drink. It's seltzer on ice." And I was like, but it feels like a drink to me.
Johanna Almstead:
It's a drink. I think it's a drink. It's not an alcoholic drink. It's not a cocktail.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
No, but it's like, sometimes Henry will make a spritzer. He loves making people spritzers. So like a little lemonade, a seltzer, like a splash-
Johanna Almstead:
Yep. Big in my house as well, love those.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
So she's like, you're just pouring out of a can onto ice. I was like, oh, right. It's not like a drink.
Johanna Almstead:
I don't know. I don't know if I agree with her. I think that's a little bit mean and kind of judgy.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It's delicious. I'm a Spindrift fan.
Johanna Almstead:
I love a Spindrift. What flavor do you like?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I like pink lemonade, lemonade, grapefruit.
Johanna Almstead:
I like the grapefruit. I like the lime too. I do the lime.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I do like the lime too.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. Have you ever had a moment in your life where, based on our earlier conversation about making some mistakes, maybe you have had a few, where you've had to eat your words, where you're like, oh God?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Constantly.
Johanna Almstead:
Every day.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Pretty much.
Johanna Almstead:
Especially as a parent, right?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Well, yes. And I think I'm getting better at it, like pausing before I speak, but I've definitely had to make amends for things I've said. I try to stay really accountable now, especially in sobriety. But I am such a mouth-runner. Honestly, it gets really bad in the park with the dogs.
Johanna Almstead:
What do you mean? You're yelling at people's dogs?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
There's so many dogs. No, I'm yelling at people.
Johanna Almstead:
About their dogs.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
About their dogs. There's one dog that goes after my friend's dog all the time and I've just had it and I will just unleash a tirade on this woman.
Johanna Almstead:
Hence the spicy shishito pepper.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Exactly.
Johanna Almstead:
Got you. Okay.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It's like more jalapeno territory.
Johanna Almstead:
Ghost Pepper territory.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I was going to say Ghost Pepper.
Johanna Almstead:
It's when the Ghost Pepper comes out, people are like, watch out world. She's ghost peppering.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Exactly. Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
These are strangers I'm assuming in the park. Do you then apologize to them afterwards or then you just have to see them every day and it's awkward? Or you just keep yelling at them every day?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It's not awkward. Anytime that her dog goes after my friend's dog, I'm yelling at her. I probably should apologize, but I'm not there yet.
Johanna Almstead:
Watch out lady in the park with your dumb dog.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. If you could eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
That I would have to say a really good baguette with butter, like Euro-butter.
Johanna Almstead:
Yes. You're not the first person .
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Ad really good salt.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, like the big flaky kind? Do you flaky salt on that?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Mm-hmm.
Johanna Almstead:
I like that too. What do you wear when you feel like you need to take on the world?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
So hard because I don't power that often. You know what I mean? It's pretty chill here these days.
Johanna Almstead:
What makes you feel good, I should say? You don't have to be powerful. You can just feel good.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I think that at this stage of my life, I have jeans that I just feel like good in. They fit right. They're not trendy. They're not like mom jeans or whatever, but they're jeans for a mom who works.
Johanna Almstead:
There's a big distinction between those two things, people.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
Mom jeans and jeans for moms who are cool are two different things.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Exactly. We're cool moms.
Johanna Almstead:
Cool moms.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
We're not regular moms.
Johanna Almstead:
Nope.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
And like a button down or a really nice cashmere sweater. A nice jacket, a nice shoe. I don't want to wear cheap shit anymore.
Johanna Almstead:
No.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
It doesn't make me feel good.
Johanna Almstead:
I agree. Investment pieces.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Like a good shoe, yeah. Where is your happy place?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I think it's a lot of different places. I don't think I have a happy place. I think my happy place is corny, but wherever my son is.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. I don't think that's corny. I think that's nice.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
But yeah, I love Prospect Park. It's a happy place for me. Buffalo is a happy place for me these days as I've grown up and out of it fully. I love being there, it feels good. I would say those. The beach is also a really happy place for me.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. It's funny how those places, I just had someone else who she had grown up in rural New Hampshire and she said growing up, she kind of hated it, but now it's become her happy place.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah, same.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Dream dinner party guest list. Who are you having over for dinner?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Oh gosh. I would want it to be fun.
Johanna Almstead:
Obs. You're like, I want to throw a really sucky dinner party. I'm going to invite terrible people.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Not terrible, but should I take that opportunity to learn something? Okay. Michelle Obama.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, okay. Like it.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
She seems like she would be fun and also I just am obsessed with her. I would want, who seems like so fun to me and I've met him a times but don't know him at all, is Michael Kors. He seems like he would just be so fun to have at a dinner party.
Johanna Almstead:
Yes.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Andy Warhol seems like he would be also so fun. I'm trying to think of current people. God, I feel like this is, I'm going to think of a thousand people after.
Johanna Almstead:
Of course you are. That's part of what happens here.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
You know who seems really fun and I'm obsessed with too, is Dakota Johnson. Oh, Pedro Pascal.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh my god, yes.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
But we may have to separate them because they're best friends and we would probably feel FOMO, like left out.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, I'd be jealous.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
I think you should sit him next to you.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
And maybe Michelle Obama on the other side.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay, this is turning out to be a good party. I'm into this. It's a good list.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
You too.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, thanks.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
You're invited. I've never been invited before, I don't think.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh really?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
One other person, yeah. Thanks.
Johanna Almstead:
You're definitely invited.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I make parties fun.
Johanna Almstead:
And the best spread in town for sure. I would want my friends there too. My best friend I've known since first grade, I love her. The more time with her, my other best friend in LA, I want time with them. I don't get enough time with them. My college best friend, she can come. My dad, could be fun to have him there. He died in 2008, I think. That's always so hard. I think I blocked out the exact date. But my grandparents.
Would you want him at the age that he died or would you want your dad at the age he would've been now if he stayed alive?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
You know what, I would want my dad when he was in his 20s.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. That's so fun. I think that's a good one. Oh, this is a good party. I feel really good about this.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I know. It would be fun.
Johanna Almstead:
It would be really good. What's your go-to coping mechanism on a bad day? Like shit's going sideways.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
A walk. Always a walk.
Johanna Almstead:
And you actually do it. You'll just get up from your computer or stop whatever you're doing and go and take a walk?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
All the time.
Johanna Almstead:
So good. I don't do that.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
With the dog, without the dog. Well, I live in a very walky place. I don't know where you live now, but you don't. I mean you do though. It's actually a beautiful, it's like a more beautiful walk.
Johanna Almstead:
But I'm not really going anywhere. I'm not walking to the deli, I'm walking to the woods.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
A walk is like, it changes everything so quickly.
Johanna Almstead:
So good. Okay, last question. What is one thing you know for sure right now, today, here in this moment?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
We're all going to be okay.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I really know it. It's not going to be easy, it's not easy, but we're going to be okay.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, I sure hope so.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
We are. It's going to be bumpy. The change is the hardest part. It's always darkest before the dawn.
Johanna Almstead:
Oof. I really hope the dawn is coming soon.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
I know. It's like fucking pitch black.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, it's definitely dark. But that's probably a whole other episode.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
Will you please tell people where they can find you if they would like to hire you for brand communications and strategy business? What's your website?
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yes. JuliaKalachnikoff.com.
Johanna Almstead:
Yes.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Should I spell it?
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, spell it.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
J-U-L-I-A-K-A-L-A-C-H-N-I-K-O-F-F, as in Frank Frank.
Johanna Almstead:
As in Frank Frank.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Amazing. Well, this has been a blast and thank you so much for taking the time out of your day. I hope we didn't frustrate your son in the other room too badly.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
No, I'm sure he is snacking and on every device he can find.
Johanna Almstead:
He's like taking full advantage. I really would like to see you IRL very, very soon.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Same. Please.
Johanna Almstead:
I'm so grateful that you spent this time with me today, so thank you.
Julia Kalachnikoff:
Thank you so much for having me. I love you.
Johanna Almstead:
I love you.
That was amazing. I just love her. I could talk about food and fashion with her forever. As always, thank you guys so much for tuning in. I hope you enjoyed hearing her story. I hope that it inspired you or challenged you or provoked you. If you think someone might like this, please share it with them. Also, please follow us on Instagram and TikTok. We are @eatmywordsthepodcast. And as always, thank you, thank you, thank you for tuning in. We are growing guys like Gremlins and it's all thanks to you, so thank you, thank you, thank you.
The Eat My Words podcast has been created and directed by me, Johanna Almstead. Our producer is Sophy Drouin. Our audio editor is Isabel Robertson, and our brand manager is Mila Boujnah.